The Great Escape: Jackie

Having just reached seven o'clock, I finally heard the garage door close, and Kevin calling out my name. "Jackie?" I was now sitting up against the bed, with my book in hand.

Seven was earlier than some days that he came home, but somehow I wished it had been earlier. And since I was practically starving and didn't think he would come home any earlier, I indulged in some of Roxy's soup around five-thirty.

With that thought, I went back to reading until he was leaning against the doorframe, with some of my favorite flowers in hand.

I realized that they were the same flowers that had been used at our wedding; symbolized for admiration, deep love and a woman's affection. These flowers just happened to be carnations, and had always been my favorite.

Kevin would bring one with him on almost every date, after we revealed what some of our favorite things were. Then they showed up during our wedding, when Patrick and Sophie were born. And then as quickly as it had come, it all stopped.

While I ravished in becoming a mother to two beautiful children, I never realized how hard it would be to raise a family almost solo—even though I had watched my mother struggle through it many years ago.

Like my father, Kevin also took a flying leap into his career. We constantly took a backseat, and nothing else seemed to matter. When my parents came to visit me at boarding school— it wasn't often. Mostly my mom came alone, and I would visit on holidays.

"Key?"

"I haven't gotten flowers from you in years. I'm surprised more than anything that you 

remember what I love."

"Of course I remember what you love."

"Then why did you stop? I think the last time I ever got flowers from you, was when Sophie was born."

Handing me the flowers, I buried my nose into them. I had almost forgotten what carnations smelled like. While every time I did, it had me traveling back to the happier times in my life.

"I think we both know that life got busy. At the time we had an almost four year old and a newborn—"

Raising my eyebrow sharply, I wondered just how much more his ego could inflate. His back was now turned towards me, so I couldn't see the expression on his face as he leaned over to untie his shoes.

I knew what he wanted to say was on the tip of his tongue. The words 'and my career' made my expression turn sour. But what I hated to say the most: was that every day was about his career and him.

Putting the flowers to the side, I was afraid that I would crush them if I held them in my hand much longer.

"You'll never believe who called my office today." I went back to reading, and waited until he had turned around to see if I was paying attention. "Sophie."

"You talked to Sophie?"

"I wasn't going to tell you this. Before you got sick, I invited Sophie to come spend the 

weekend as a surprise to you for our anniversary. I was going to have her surprise you when 

she came in on Saturday."

"Saturday." I repeated, slightly surprised. "That's a day from now." It wasn't like I didn't want our daughter to visit, but it made me slightly nervous to be alone with her. It seemed like no matter how much I tried—she wanted nothing to do with me.

Kevin called over his shoulder as changed out of uniform. "I've been granted a couple days off, so I was trying to get as much as I could done as I could at the office. Sophie called just as I was packing up to leave."

I gave a sigh of relief, although it had been awhile since we had all functioned as a family. 

"What exactly did she say?"

"She was confirming her flight, and when she would be getting in." He disappeared into the 

bathroom to splash his face with cool water, and came back out with a towel in hand. "I'll be 

picking her up around nine from the airport.

"I have the FRG meeting around nine, but we can meet for an early lunch around eleven?"

"I don't see why not. I already have reservations for the best restaurant in town." He said proudly moving his shoes and uniform into the closet.

"Perfect. Now, I would like to know what you've done with my husband."

The hanger made a scraping noise as he hung his uniform up. It took him a minute to think about it. "He took the weekend off to be with his wife."

I sat on the edge of the edge of the bed as I grabbed the flowers—a smile on my face. "I think I'm going to put these flowers in some water."

"Does this mean I'm off the hook?" He inquired, catching my arm and pulling me in.

"Not if you ruin the flowers." I teased, as we both gazed down at the flowers that had been caught between our bodies, and kept us from being close. Sadly, it felt ironic to the relationship between us as husband and wife. My smile seemed to falter at the thought of us pushing each other away for too long.

"That's better." His hands protectively went down to the small of my back and covered my hips. "You okay?" His voice sounded so far away. "Key? You're not going to pass out of me again—"

It took a few more seconds before I was able to snap out of my thoughts. "No. Just a little tired, that's all." We went a few moments in silence as slowly intertwined my fingers with his. 

"When you talked to Denise this morning, what exactly did you say?"

We began to sway back and forth. "I may have suggested that you needed to get out of the 

house. I also forgot how observant Denise Sherwood is, because pretty soon she was talking 

about taking you and General Holden's wife to lunch."

"Claudia Joy."

"Claudia Joy" He repeated, turning us around slowly in a circle. "What did you think I meant, when I wrote that note?"

The room suddenly felt quite uncomfortable as I rubbed at my brow. "I was hoping that we could actually spend some time together. When was the last time that we went on vacation with just the two of us? Hmm? As a family?

"You know that it's not that easy—"

"Of course I know that! Sometimes, I'd like for us to act like a normal family: where we actually go on vacations—even if it's only for a couple of days." I shrugged, already knowing that my wishes would probably never happen.

"And I know that I don't have to tell you twice—my job doesn't really allow us the option of getting away." He sighed deeply. "I assume that you've already eaten?" I nodded. "I'm going to shower, then grab something to eat. I'm sure that we'll have plenty of time this weekend to talk."

I turned my head as he ended up kissing me on the cheek. Something in the tone of his voice, told me that his promise was not legit and would not happen. As soon as he had 

closed the door, I changed into my pajamas and slipped into bed.

It was relatively early to even think about sleep, and pulled out my book. The water turned on and became the background music to my thoughts. My eyes glanced at the flowers that 

were still sitting on top of the dresser, and I put the book down.

The thought knotted in my mind and slipped through, as I began to wonder if he meant what he had said at the banquet: about never being able to get this far in his career without me. 

But the more I thought about it, the more I realized that I was still going through life alone.