May I: Stay

As far as she knew, she had slept almost all the way home—until he had picked her up. It felt a little like déjà vu, as he carried up to the house. ”I’ve brought you home. Think you can manage to stand for a few minutes? You’re going to need your keys to get in.”

She nodded, and he put her down slowly. He watched as she swayed slightly; leaned against the house as she went through her purse and produced the key. It was an odd feeling, as she felt partially drunk—even though she hadn’t a drop since earlier in the week.

The door clicked open and he helped her in. She stopped when she saw the blanket on the couch; Sophie’s bag and blanket and doll were still lying on the floor. Gillian had to blink back some tears as she started up the stairs, with Cal close behind.

When they were half up, Gillian finally wiped the tears from her cheeks and headed down the hall to her bedroom. He followed her wordlessly, until he had tucked her in. “How’s your arm?”

She pulled it out the covers, twisting it slowly. “Still a little stiff, but that probably had something to do with landing on my shoulder.”

“And the nightmares?”

Their eyes met, as he sat on the edge of the bed. “I guess I’ve been too busy to have the nightmares—or at least to remember them.” Although, something in the back of her mind told her otherwise.

“Good.”

Letting out a yawn, her eyes grew heavy once more and she couldn’t keep them anymore.  As he got up to leave, she stirred and called out to him. “Stay.” When he didn’t move, she wearily opened her eyes.

“Hmm.”

“Stay here.” She clarified; her voice thick with sleep. “At least until I fall asleep.”

 Cal sat back on the edge of the bed. “Until you fall back to sleep.” He promised, as he sat back on the edge of the bed. Gazing down, he saw her hand resting by her side; resisted the urge to take it. “Would you like me to tell you a bed time story?” Now he was teasing her, but succeeded by getting the faintest smile and a laugh as she snuggled into the pillow, with a deep sigh.

“I need you too, Cal.” He waited until he was sure that she was asleep, and closed the door to her bedroom. He knew that she had been almost asleep, when she had uttered those words, which rang in his ears as he went back downstairs.

Thinking about it as he walked around the house, he suddenly felt antsy. The way she had used those words: a delicate whisper— filled with sleep, was almost like he was in a dream of his own. His relationship with Gillian had been just “friends” for the past five years, and not once had those words been used like they had. But he wished that they had not been said under these circumstances, when it was possible she wouldn’t remember what had been said when she woke.

However—one thing he was sure about now that he wasn’t before, was that she hadn’t been completely asleep in the car when he had told her that he needed her. It complicated things a bit as well. When his job was to help people: read lies by microexpressions, he felt confident. He had always prided himself on the job he did when solving cases. With Gillian it was a completely different ballgame that he was still trying to figure out, and it puzzled him completely.

There was something there; nagging at him that she was the one for him—again. He would usually ignore that little voice and tell himself that he was being completely foolish for even thinking about going after her. Today he was starting to believe it—just a little.

Finally perusing the bookshelf in her living room, he settled down on the couch and read until he was halfway through the book. When he looked at his watch, he found that a couple hours had gone by and Gillian still wasn’t up yet.  As he put the book down on the coffee table, he couldn’t resist checking up on her to make sure that she was okay.

He found her breathing soothing, and she was almost in the same position that she had fallen asleep in. In no way did he want her to wake up, because he knew that when she did, she would want to go right back to the hospital. He quickly shut the door after hearing his phone vibrating in his pocket.

How is Sophie? The text said simply. He didn’t feel like explaining it to anyone. Not even to his daughter, as he wanted to protect her—not ruin her.

It took him a few minutes to think of what to say. Still in the hospital. I’ll explain later.

Whatever it is, I can handle it. He sighed as she wrote him again. “If it’s that serious, I should be home with you . . . with Gillian.”

You should stay with your mother, at least until Monday. I’m going back and forth a lot. I’m afraid that neither one of us would make very good company right now. With that, he pocketed the phone and went back to reading. Not even five minutes later and the familiar ring in his pocket could be heard.

“Zoe.” He offered after checking the caller ID.

“She’s pretty freaked out, Cal.” His ex-wife greeted into the phone. “Emily told me what happened when she came over yesterday. When were you going to tell me that Gillian was staying at the house?”   

“I wasn’t going to. It’s not mine to tell.”

“It is if they’re going to be around our daughter.  Not that I have anything against Gillian. I see the way that you look at her. You haven’t looked at anyone that way since we were together—so naturally I’m a bit jealous that our relationship wasn’t like that when we were together.”

“We certainly had our moments.” Cal mused, picking up the book again and skimming through the current page he was reading.

“Yeah, we did.” She said through her smile. “How’s she holding up?”

His eyes cast up towards the stairs. “She got out mostly with only bruises and scratches, but it’s going to be awhile before things seem normal again.”

“I wouldn’t expect it will be any time soon.”

“No, it won’t.”

“I think there are some things going on with Emily that I think we should discuss.” Her voice lowered, a few footsteps followed as if she were changing rooms for privacy.

“She hasn’t been herself lately.”

“I’ve already asked, and our daughter insists that everything’s fine.”Zoe sighed in frustration. “Although, she is fifteen and we are her parents.”  

The wood creaked, which caused Cal to look up. He saw a rather refreshed looking Gillian trying to sneak by to the kitchen. Giving her a look that she could stay, she shook her head. This was a private conversation between him and Zoe, so when he wasn’t looking, she went into the kitchen and left them to finish their conversation.